The Troubles of Working II: Making Dinner

As I explained last week, doing dishes seems to be something that piles up a lot for me during the week, when I am caught in the whirlwind of work and activities and so on. Another "simple" task that tends to get tricky for me is making dinner. Unfortunately, it also has to happen EVERY...DAY. Who knew we had to EAT EVERYDAY? Ugh.

It's hard when you want to make fun, healthy, gourmet, complicated meals. Constantly making boxed mac and cheese isn't very healthy, and purchasing healthy frozen food gets expensive, very expensive. One big helpful hint I have is to simply make a list of dinner ideas during the weekend so you can plan out the meals, especially for busy days. For example, on Mondays I have 45 mins between jobs, and I'm gone from home 8am until 9pm, so I've got to eat dinner in those 45 mins. I can't waste the precious time deciding what I want to make, looking up recipes, checking if I've got ingredients, etc. And being a busy day, I especially need good nutrition. Planning out the meal ahead of time makes it so much easier!

Another tip is to make double to save for later. There are many good recipes that can be frozen, and reheat very well, like chili or sweet potato veggie burgers (more on those later). It takes the same amount of time to prep and cook double, and it's a huge time saver to microwave your own homemade, delicious and healthy food on your busy days.

A third tip is to plan to make simple dinners. You'd be surprised how fast it is to sauté some veggies and combine them with pre-cooked rice and beans. Or chop up some fruit with nuts and dried craisins for a salad. Even super nutritious sandwiches like avocado, tomato, alfalfa sprouts and hummus are quick to make.

Finally, staples are good. Once you have experimented with recipes, you'll know which are your favorites and be able to make them much quicker because you'll know how the process goes. I always find new recipes are harder because I have to figure out if it's cooked all the way? If it's supposed to look like this? Find those dinner staples, and plan to cook them certain weeknights.

As a recap:
- plan out meals
- make extra for next time, freeze it
- make simple meals like salad, sandwiches, lightly steamed veggies, etc.
- in a strap, stick to staples
- plan, plan, plan! planning is your friend

The Troubles of Working I: Dishes

If I’m very busy and haven’t done the dishes, or have made a frozen dinner for pizza, or have bought a card for someone instead of making it, or haven’t swept, I feel bad. I feel like I’m failing at a duty I take very seriously.

When you work full time, especially with elementary children, you are very tired when you get home. You don’t have much energy. I may have some energy left, but I tend to use it up on the various physical activities I do: dancing, running, and martial arts. So after a looooong day who wants do to dishes, especially after cooking a full meal? When you could read, hang out with the husband, catch up with a show, or simply relax. But the dishes are always piling up, and they tend to be the most obvious and most annoying sign that we have fallen behind on domestic duties.

I have discovered that if I do the dishes as I cook, the whole process is less painful. If there’s only a few dishes left in the sink as I’m serving the meal, it does not seem as daunting to do them after I’ve finished eating. Wash a bowl here, throw a plate in the dishwasher there, stir the pot and check the muffins. Kitchen multitasking can be great as long as you set your timer, and make sure you stick to washing as many dishes as you can manage in the time it takes for the water to boil or the pizza to bake.

As my husband says, being domestic is not necessarily about being clean or keeping appearances. It can also be about keeping a harmonious home environment. Being domestic can mean making sure the insides match the outsides. Making sure that your mind is not a chaotic heap of laundry and dishes and take-out, but instead an organized and usable space with clean surfaces and a balanced diet. Balance can be reached, even when working full time! You just have to find the method that works for you. And also give yourself a break once in a while!

Benefits of Hard Wood Floors: Sweeping is Zen

I’ve never been much for carpets. I’ve only lived with carpeted floors for a few years in college and pre-house apartments. During that time, I hated vacuuming because it was loud, I always got the cord wound on something, and then there’s the matter of emptying the bag. Most of my life I’ve had tile and hard wood floors. With our cats, all rugs and carpets get puked and peed on, so we basically can’t have anything on the floors. Not even in the bathrooms. It’s so much fun in the polar vortex winter!

But I digress. I’ve been discovering how nice it is to sweep the empty, uncarpeted floors, to follow the lines of the wood and to carefully caress the contours of our rooms with my soft broom. It is repetitive, and quiet. A time that I can take to empty my mind and think of nothing, to do nothing but concentrate on the brushes lightly gathering the dust and hair to leave an empty, lustrous surface behind. It is also a time that I can get reacquainted with my house, with every corner and nook I may have forgotten. A time to appreciate the dimensions, colors and sights of the place I spend so much time and dedication on. I am always reminded of how nice it is to have a modestly sized-house, because sweeping my entire house will only take about an hour. Even when it seems like a drag to sweep, I realize it is good for my mind. That it’s just as beneficial, or even more so, than to sit in front of my computer reading blogs (oops!) or catching up on TV shows.

Once we have swept, we can walk on the smooth floor in our socks and pretend that no dirt was ever on the beautiful clear surface. We can look at the shiny wooden surface and hopefully see a reflection of ourselves that we are content with.

Thoughts on Being Domestic

What is being domestic?

Is it synonymous with being a woman? An antonym with being a “modern educated woman”?

I grew up in Argentina, where many of my friend’s mothers stayed at home to make dinner, clean the house, do the grocery shopping. Be domestic. Some had jobs, and there wasn’t huge pressure to quit your job when you got married. But there was a lot of pressure for a woman to clean the house and make dinner, and look nice while doing it, regardless of the job situation.  Then we moved to the United States when I was 13 years old, where it seemed like making dinner from scratch or brushing the grout between bathroom tiles was a lot harder, considering the long work hours and commutes for everyone.

While we lived in Argentina, my mom was mostly a homemaker, working on real-estate management but having a lot of time to cook, clean and work on various projects around the house (including sowing beautiful dance costumes, but more on that later). For that matter, my dad was self-employed and also had time to make additions to the house or work on our back yard. This situation instilled in me a sense of the importance of the home and of doing things yourself from scratch. When we moved to the U.S., both my parents had busy full time jobs and things changed a bit, although there was still an emphasis on prioritizing home and domesticity.

It has been a struggle for me at times to balance work and being domestic, going from jobs I’ve had with very long commutes, to jobs with very long and crazy hours, to finally a more consistent job but also a lot of activities. I’m finding that I still place being domestic high on the list of priorities, but work is also important, so I have to find a balance. Snow days and weekends help a lot, because I get a lot done. I’ve also learned from my mom that at different times in your life, priorities may change. She was very domestic for 13 years, but had worked full time for a decade before and worked for another decade after. You can sew your own Halloween costumes, but also work a six day week! It just takes a lot of planning and time management.

Ultimately, I consider being domestic important because to me you spend energy on the things you love, and I love my home, cats and husband  so I want to spend energy on the food we eat, the rooms we live in, and the things we use. I'd rather spend that extra effort on making homemade cupcakes for a birthday even if it means I don't spend a lot of money on them. Because time and energy are precious resources and they show how much you care.

Here are my thoughts and ideas as I attempt to balance work, husband, friends, family, passions and hobbies and being domestic while not going crazy! And tips I’ve learned that have helped me balance it all a bit...